Because Snapchat brings out a whole different side of people.
1. Drunk Party Girl
Drunk Party Girl’s Snaps are always a blur of loud music, flashing lights and duck face selfies. If you’re lucky, you might even chance upon the occasional Drunken Mess Snap, where she’ll start rambling on about her ex and how she’s better off being siiiiiingle *insert sassy finger snap*.
Oh honey, didn’t anybody warn you? Never Snap and tap when you’re drunk.
(Source: girlwithnojob’s Instagram)
2. The Snapchat Troll
The Snapchat Troll is the worst person to have around when you’re being a Drunk Party Girl (see above), because he has no qualms about Snapping you in the most compromising of positions (aka passed out on a chair, next to an empty bottle of vodka and a broken glass). His Snapchat Story is usually a compilation of incriminating photos and videos of his friends. Not cool bro, not cool at all.
3. The Ninja Boaster
The Ninja Boaster enjoys posting #casual Snaps of his life…except oh wait, is that a Rolex staring straight in your face? Okay okay, we get it. Your life is fabulous. Now excuse us while we Snap about our mediocre lives instead, like how we woke up with a monster pimple that even filters can’t hide.
(Source: Rich Kids of Snapchat Facebook)
4. The Obsessive Pet Snapper
This is the Snapchatter whose Story usually consists of multiple videos of her dog or cat. Like, here’s my dog sleeping upside down. And here’s my dog waking up. And here he is again waking up and looking at me. Sometimes you start to wonder if she has life outside of being a crazy cat/dog lady but…oh wait, this actually kinda sounds like me. *hides*
This is but a small sampling of my extensive pet photo collection.
5. The Snapchat Reporter
The Snapchat Reporter usually has someone else record her Snaps, so that she can show you her yoga poses and OOTDs in all their full glory. Whether she’s doing her daily squats by the pool or attending a glitzy event (that you’ll probably never be invited to), you can always live vicariously through the Snapchat Reporter.
We always wonder though – who exactly is behind the camera? The obliging boyfie? An eager assistant? Or just a really capable maid? The mystery continues…
6. The One Who’s Always “Eating”
You know, I thought Instagram was bad but Snapchat is a breeding ground for gratuitous photos and videos of food. I have nothing against skinny chicks (I mean, who doesn’t want to be slimmer am I right) but when they post Snaps of an entire table of food and are like, “All mine! I’m such a glutton tee hee hee!” aren’t you just like MMHMMM did you really eat all of that? #suspect
7. The One Who Always Gives You FOMO
As her title suggests, this is the Snapchatter whose fabulous Snaps always make you feel like you’re missing out on life. Because instead of being on a Saturdate with bae or partying with your #squad, you’re really just at home watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians in your pyjamas. Exciting.
8. The Snapchat Backup
The Snapchat Backup is the person whose Snaps you only watch when none of your other friends have new posts, or when you’re exceptionally bored. You know what the Snapchat litmus test for a true BFF is? When you tap and load all her Snaps even when you’re on data. #truesacrifice
9. The One Whose Snaps Are Painfully Boring
WHY would anyone want to watch a 10 second video of your bowl of fish soup?! I can’t even. #stahp
10. The Snapchat Vlogger
The Snapchat Vlogger makes recording videos look effortless, because she somehow always manages to talk naturally to the camera while navigating a busy street, weird stares be damned.
In fact, her Snaps almost make you want to start vlogging too…except you never know what to say once you start recording. Oh and have we mentioned how re-watching your Snap video is also mildly traumatising? Most of the time I’m like wow do I really sound like that and why is my mouth so weird OH GOD DELETE DELETE OK WHEW.